Flip through the latest issue of Gulf Weekly.
I stumbled across an article on the internet about the mid-life crisis and according to their definition I could be as little as six years away from mine. That's a very frightening thought!
About.com says: 'A mid-life crisis is experienced between the ages of 40 and 60. It was first identified by the psychologist Carl Jung and is a normal part of the maturing process. Most people will experience some form of emotional transition during that time of life. A transition that might cause you to take stock of where you are in life and make some needed adjustments to the way you live your life. Most seem to come through the process smoothly without making major life changes'.
I never really have been a 'most' kind of girl and quite apart from the fact that my entire life seems to be one big 'emotional transition' and I'm unlikely to tell the difference when it turns out to be a mid-life crisis, I'm still just coming to terms with the fact that I'm old enough to have a teenage son - let alone that close to middle-age!
Some of you out there may already be in full mid-life crisis swing and not even really realise it, thinking instead that you're just having a hard time of things at the moment.
Not identifying that you are actually going through a mid-life crisis means that you won't treat it properly and you could have a much harder time of it than if you knew what you were dealing with.
So here are a few signs to look out for:
l Questioning the decisions you've made in your life and wondering if you're travelling down the path you were supposed to travel or whether you took a wrong turn somewhere and aren't making the most of your life.
l Unhappiness with the life you have at the moment - wishing instead that you could do something more interesting and adventurous.
l Boredom with the people and places around you - finding it very hard to get excited or have fun with anything that you do.
l Anger and resentment towards your spouse - feeling that you're tied down and they're to blame for your unhappiness. Doubts that you ever really loved your spouse in the first place and thoughts of a new, more passionate relationship.
On their own any of the above would seem like perfectly normal stages to go through in your life. A passing fad that's gone before any real damage is caused, but if you're displaying more than one symptom at a time it could be more serious.
You need to first admit to yourself that what you're going through is your problem, not that of anyone else around you. Don't blame your loved ones for the way you're feeling. You're going to need them to help you through this phase of your life and alienating them could end in a divorce.
Explain how you're feeling to them. Tell them that you need their help in deciding what would be best for you at this time.
When you think about the mid-life crisis, the stereotype springs to mind of a middle-aged man going out and buying himself a new sports car and running off with his secretary or a woman leaving her family to take some spiritual journey of self discovery.
It's those stereotypes that make us think of a mid-life crisis in a negative way and that all the changes we make in our lives while we're going through it are mistakes but it doesn't have to be that way at all.
Just because you start to evaluate your life and decide that you need to make some changes, doesn't necessarily mean that you're going to make a mess of the good thing you already have in life.
Simply putting the need for a change down to a mid-life crisis and ignoring it, won't solve anything. It's not the need for change that's the problem, it's the way you go about making that change that matters.
If you work with your partner to try and change things for the better, you can come out of your mid-life crisis on the winning side.
Talk about what you need and listen to what your partner says, he/she has needs too so find a way to make the changes you need while satisfying both sides.
You'll find that once you've made a big positive change in your life that makes you feel good about yourself, you'll soon stop being bored/restless/angry with the other aspects of your life. At the end of the day, a mid-life crisis isn't the end of the world but if you deal with it properly you can make the little piece of world that you inhabit a much better place for you and the people around you.
