Flip through the latest issue of Gulf Weekly.
I hate Steven Seagal ... I really do. I hate the way he talks, walks, looks and acts.
Oh and I just can't stand his pony tail.
Whenever I see his facw on TV, I immediately change the channel.
His movies are a flop and the stories are terrible. I don't know why anyone would waste money and expertise on making movies with him.
So you can imagine the agony I felt at having to waste my time and my weekend on watching him in the cinema.
What made the whole thing worse was the movie ... it was a failure.
In Kill Switch, Seagal (Jacob King) is a ruthless homicide detective who's known for breaking the rules and getting stuff done.
Seagal is trailing two different killers in this movie.
One is named Billy Joe and his speciality is implanting explosives under his victims' skin and then blowing them up, which is kind of stupid I think.
The other killer is The Grifter and he enjoys carving astrological symbols into his victims, when his crimes are plotted on a map the image matches perfectly with a constellation.
The funny part is that Seagal, being a very clever detective never finds out who the Grifter is until he accidentally loses his wallet at one of the crime scenes. The movie has several flashbacks of Seagal as a young boy played by an actor who looks nothing like him.
The fight scenes, usually a strong point in Seagal films, were quite boring. In fact, there was no real fighting at all, just Seagal beating up the bad guys.
Seriously there is nothing good about this movie, the more you spend time watching it the more you will discover how ridiculous it is.
If you want to punish yourself for doing something bad go and watch this movie.
Showing in: Seef (II), Saar Ciniplex and Al Jazeera Ciniplex.
