Dear Umm Al Bahrain

IT is a terrible thing when you lose your mother; she leaves behind an aching void that can't be filled.

You wonder how you can go on without her. Who is there to look to for solace in your time of need, who is there to offer support and kindly advice when you are stressed and who is there to help you steer a safe path back to calm waters when you are in turmoil? Who will motivate and inspire you to greater things and lead by shining example?

These are just some of the questions the kingdom has been asking itself this week with the sad loss of Her Highness Shaikha Hessa bint Salman Al Khalifa.

Shaikha Hessa was the wife of our late, much loved Amir, Shaikh Isa bin Salman Al Khalifa and the beloved mother of His Majesty King Hamad.

But she was more than that, she was 'Umm Al Bahrain', the Mother of Bahrain.

She was a unique individual with a very powerful belief in the sanctity of family and the vitally important role it had to play in the development of society.

Next to family, the dearest thing to Shaikha Hessa's heart was charity. She was patron to several high-profile charities and was happy to lend her name to them as she realised this would encourage others to donate and support these worthwhile causes. However, a lot of her charity work was carried out unseen and unsung.

She would routinely send staff into the villages to seek out poor families that needed assistance, and whether this took the form of food, clothing or cash, the families never knew the true identity of their benefactor.

I first met Her Highness many years ago and used to marvel at her energy. Not for her, slouching in bed until lunchtime, she was an early riser and more than once I was invited to visit for breakfast at 8am.

Shaikha Hessa did not have the advantage of a classical education that today's young women take for granted, but she was a highly intelligent woman, with a humble, pioneering spirit and strong religious faith who most certainly had earned a PhD in life, many times over.

Her Highness loved people and loved to hear their stories and to find out what made them tick.

Her powers of memory were legendary and this was demonstrated to me when she asked after a member of my family and I shared an anecdote with her.

She could recall this 20 years later, in great detail, and when you consider how many people she met, this was no mean feat. I once asked her how she managed this. Her reply was simple and straight to the point "that's my job Betsy, yours is making people look and feel better, mine is to remember their stories".

Everyone was welcome at her weekly majlis and even in her later years as her health failed her, Her Highness' sense of duty and love of people meant she continued holding her majlis whenever she could.

She had an adventurous spirit and loved to travel and experience new cultures, but was never happier than when she was at home in Bahrain surrounded by her family and her people.

Her strength of character and deep faith was severely tested some years ago when she suffered a stroke. I was with Her Highness every day for several months as she recovered and with great admiration I watched her steely determination, inner strength and faith in Allah lead her to a recovery that many never thought possible and that would have caused many weaker individuals to crumble and fade away.

Through all of her challenges, Shaikha Hessa's wicked sense of humour never deserted her. She would often greet me with "Betsy, you are still overweight, you must stop eating chocolate, it's bad for you" and I would agree, with a sigh. Later, her driver would deliver a huge tray of chocolates for me, she knew I was a hopeless chocoholic and this was her little way of teasing me.

Her Highness encouraged me to speak Arabic whenever I was with her to help me improve my linguistic skills and one day I realised how much my skills had improved when Her Highness, chatting to another guest, made a funny remark about something in Arabic and I began laughing without realising she was speaking Arabic and that I had understood her. She was quick to retort, "Ah at last, well that's good progress, Betsy, but now I will have to watch what I say when you are around!"

Her kindness to those in need and her no nonsense advice for those who were floundering, combined with her natural leadership abilities, resulted in a wonderfully inspiring 'Amira' who was proud to witness such marvelous progress in her beloved country and would often share with me her memories of life in the early days in Bahrain and how many difficulties were overcome by a combination of courage, determination and faith. As I write this, I realise that this is a perfect description of how Shaikha Hessa lived her life.

Her Highness dedicated her life to her family and her country and her sense of duty was unquestionable.

Irreplaceable, unforgettable and unique, Bahrain has much to thank Her Highness for, but her most important legacy is that she has provided the kingdom with a generous spirited, courageous, wise and visionary leader, her son, His Majesty King Hamad bin Isa Al Khalifa. Ma'assalama, Umm al Bahrain.