It's the power of pink

IT began the week our daughter, Catrin, was born. In a card, a friend with a daughter wrote menacingly, "Welcome to the world of pink..."

We had a boy already, so we knew that certain behaviour is innate - we deprived our son of a toy AK-47, so he made guns out of sticks. Equally untaught, our now two-year-old daughter will wrap the same sticks in a blanket and attempt to cheer them up.

Hunting and nurturing, it seems, come naturally, and that's quite sweet. But retailers exploit these instincts for profit. Girls might naturally be drawn to femininity, but never have their fantasies been so vividly available in material form, and never so young.

"Pink is just the marketeer's way of getting at girls' psyches," claims Sue Palmer, former head teacher, literacy guru and author of the bestselling book Toxic Childhood. "It's grooming them for a lifetime of consumption. Companies started marketing to very young children in the 90s, when they discovered that babies could recognise logos before the age of one."

Christmas shopping last year, I was overwhelmed by the sickly glow in the girls' toy department in an outlet. Ever brighter, the latest pink toys vibrate on the shelves until the walls seem to close in. The words "fairy", "princess" and "ballet" (often all three) are written on anything to up the pink factor.

Looking to buy pyjamas for my daughter, there was nothing untouched by pink fairy dust. The saleswoman there told me there is "no call" for anything plainer. It felt like I'd woken up in some kind of one-party state (led by Barbie, naturally); a pink dystopia, and no one has even noticed.

"People think it is harmless enough," says Lyn Mikel Brown, psychologist, activist and co-author of Packaging Girlhood: Rescuing Our Daughters from Marketers' Schemes, "but we don't see the full picture. When you put all the little pink things together and see how girls' choices are narrowed, how the marketeers have created desire in little girls to express their uniqueness through accessories, you realise how pernicious it is."

Why is there a lack of other options in an era when we are supposedly overwhelmed by choice? Why do we tell girls that there is only one way for them to be feminine?

So what's to be done? Well, if girls' love of pink isn't going away, perhaps it can be used as a force for good.

Lisa Clark, agony aunt for Mizz magazine, has written a self-help guide for teen and tween girls called Think Pink. It stars a character called Lola Love, who promises to bring out your "sparkly, gorgeous, happy-to-be-me self". She believes pink evokes happy, positive thoughts. "And, when you wear the colour pink, people respond to you in a positive way," she says.

"I make no excuses," says Miss Clark, "I'm a girl and totally embrace my femininity by wearing pink and thinking pink, and really can't see a time when pink isn't the colour of all things girl."

Only last week a shopper's pink BMW was spotted parked outside Alosra supermarket in Saar. And, no one can blame retailers for trying to keep pace with fashion - it's move or die in retail, after all. Nor can you blame individual parents for not wanting their child to be the odd one out.

Twins Aditi and Ayushi, 11, from Hoora, for example, have a room with a pink table, pink sheets and cushions. There is also a pink nightlight and their wardrobe is full of pink dresses, shoes and bags. Their bathroom boasts pink shower curtains, pink dustbins, pink doormats and to top it all ... they live in a pink building.

Mum Neelam Gupta said: "My daughters have always loved pink. Their dresses, dolls, bags, shoes have always been in shades of pink.

"They have worn pink on every single birthday and a couple of years ago when they saw a pink car in the showroom they wanted us to buy it.

"The only time I put my foot down was when they wanted to repaint their bedroom walls in pink. It is a soothing, romantic and good looking colour and I believe part of their fascination is also because I love pink and all our relatives have given the girls gifts in pink.

"I do want some changes now and I am helping the girls look at other colours like purple and yellow."

Another mother, Sue Palmer, appreciates the dilemma but is worried about being manipulated by big business. "You love your kids, you don't want to deprive them, so you join the merry-go-round," she said. "I have no problem with consumerism, as long as it's not manipulating children, but the fact is that multi-million pound budgets and the best psychological minds are being deployed in this battle."

Pink is a popular stereotype, and it seems to be one that many of us want to believe. Research published last summer suggested that girls naturally prefer pink, and it made the headlines around the globe. The fact that it was merely the opinion of 208 people was overlooked; as we lapped up far-fetched theories that cavewomen needed to be able to spot berries and flushed cheeks in dark caves.

So perhaps I should give up the fight and let Catrin turn into a pink fluffball? I know she'd love it - she already picks the pink jigsaw and chooses pink clothes given half a chance. But, I wonder, do straitjackets come in pink?