FOR a film to be worth watching it requires a combination of subtle touches and different elements including, an interesting plot, great special-effects, a clever twist and believable dialogue.
Sadly this film lacks all of the above, but it does feature Jennifer Ellison, who provides more eye candy than you can shake a stick at, so it receives partial credit at least!
In an isolated part of the British countryside, an amateur attempt at kidnapping turns into a total calamity for all those involved when they stumble upon a deranged farmer with a penchant for ... milking cows, oh and killing trespassers in a gruesome and horrific manner.
When David and his brother Peter kidnap Tracey (the daughter of a powerful gangster), they bring her to a secluded cottage in the countryside. Peter calls Tracey's father and asks for a substantial ransom to be delivered to her step-brother Andrew ... sounds fool-proof, right? Wrong!
Since Andrew is a comic relief character and has no common sense or awareness of the severity of the situation, he isn't exactly the best choice for this task. When the bag is delivered he doesn't check to see what's inside and is then followed to the cottage by two very intimidating hit-men hired by Tracey's father.
When the amateur kidnappers discover that the bag contains ordinary paper, rather than a big pile of cash, David angrily drives to a nearby village to call Tracey's father and demand the money. In his absence, his luck takes yet another turn for the worse. He returns to the cottage to find that Tracey has reversed their roles and escaped with Peter as her hostage.
Meanwhile, a crazy and horribly deformed farmer has violently killed the hit-men and, wouldn't you know it, Tracey and Peter are heading to his farm looking for a phone so that she can call her father for help.
The film begins as a comedy crime caper, but soon becomes a strange combination of horror and thriller. It's safe to say that the genre of this film jumps around more than a toddler hyped up on sugar, so the viewer is not really sure what to expect next.
However, credit where it is due, there are some genuinely suspenseful moments and the beautiful Jennifer Elisson definitely keeps the boys interested in the film when the plot fails to.
l Showing in Seef I, Saar Cineplex and Al Jazeera Cineplex