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KNIGHTS, witches, monks and other gothic delights can mean only one thing; it's time to get medieval, Nicholas Cage-style ... but it's sadly not as cool as it sounds!
According to TV interviews, Cage finally fulfilled his lifelong dream of being a knight (or at least playing one) but, ironically, his dream is a total nightmare for anyone unfortunate enough to watch this disaster of a movie.
After watching Cage's recent flop, The Sorcerer's Apprentice, in which he stars as a wizard, I found it a little ironic that his role in Season of the Witch is to track down wizards and witches and deliver them to justice ... pot, kettle, black!
The story is simple enough, a 14th Century crusader returns home from battle to find that his land has been turned upside down by the Black Plague. The church has concluded that the cause of the mysterious plague is dark magic and is hell-bent on tracking down the witches responsible for the devastation.
Enter two bad boy knights (Behmen and Felson) who are tasked with delivering a suspected witch to a group of monks who are to perform an ancient ritual, theoretically ending the plague and generally making everything hunky doory.
Behmen takes on the task but insists that the girl is given a fair trial before the ritual is carried out. Obviously the church agrees and so old Behmen and his pal set out on a perilous journey to bring the girl to a remote monestary in the middle of nowhere for the ritual. Along the way, they encounter some hilariously unbelievable characters including a priest called Debelzaq, an aspiring knight called Kay, a cantankerous old knight called Eckhart, and a traveling con artist who is acting as their guide to the monastery.
As the group embarks on their quest, they suspect that the girl is more than she seems and that their mission will put them all in terrible danger.
Aside from the painfully average special effects, the action is slow-paced and the character development leaves a lot to be desired. So, what, if anything, is good about this movie? Well, there is a nice little emotional element which revolves around Cage's character's desire to save the girl from her fate (presumably as a way to atone for his actions during the crusades). Also worth noting is Foy's ability to keep the audience guessing about her character's true intentions, although the 'plot' (and I use that word loosely) makes it abundantly clear which team she's playing for relatively early on.
I'm hoping that this movie isn't a sign of things to come from Hollywood during 2011 because, if that's the case, I'm quitting my job as a film critic and taking up a profession far less painful, such as a crash test dummy!
The bar has been set and it's so low that a professional limbo dancer couldn't wiggle under it. Fortunately there are some imminent releases, such as 127 Hours, that could change the pace and offer something mildly inspiring for cinema audiences. I wait with baited breath to see what Hollywood has to offer this year.
Showing in Cineco, Seef II, Saar Cineplex and Al Jazeera Cineplex
