The comedy dummy

Alan was devastated. Destroyed. His dummy was broken and there was no other way he could win the TALENTED TALENTS SHOW. But his grandpa gave him a surprise …

“Whoa! Gramps, where did you find this?”

 “It’s my old dummy, actually,” his grandpa replied

“I can’t wait to practice! Does it act well?’’

At this his grandpa laughed and said: “Oh my boy, it can do so much more …”

Alan couldn’t understand it. But on his first practice he got a shock.

He was thinking how to start, when suddenly he heard: “ Ow! You’re pinching my back!”

He nearly dropped his dummy.

“And now you’ve almost dropped me on the floor. What is wrong with you, kid?”

Alan now realised that the voice was coming from the dummy.

“Hold on, you can … t…talk?”

The dummy stood up and dusted himself down and snapped: “Kid, your grandpa took this way better than you. And, yes, I can talk. Humans aren’t the only things that can talk you know.”

Alan calmed himself down and replied: “ Well, anyway, my name’s Alan, so … what’s yours?”

The dummy smiled and took out a one-lensed pair of sunglasses.

“The name’s Big Eye, alias The Comedy Dummy.”

Alan knew that this ventriloquist-dummy relationship was going to take some time.

Show night

Zoner Big No was the judge, Alan gulped.

Big Eye asked: “What’s the matter, Alan?”

“Zoner’s the judge,” he replied. “And he’s never ever given anyone a YES easily. Rumour has it that he never even smiled.”

Big Eye was quick to reassure him: “Relax Alan, you have me.”

Alan muttered to himself: “That’s what I’m worried about!”

The show started. No-one seemed to impress Zoner, not even a man who was trying to teach three sheep how to sing. Next a little girl sang a song which actually almost got a smile out of Zoner. Alan was next. When he stepped on the stage he started trembling. But then he saw his grandpa smiling at him and then Big Eye said: “You can do it!”

Alan said nervously: “Hey there everybody, uhh … my name’s Alan and I’m going to be a ventriloquist.”

“Oh, enough with the intro!” Big Eye butted in. “The name’s Big Eye, alias The Comedy Dummy, or ... Biggy.”

The crowd laughed. Zoner gave a grin. Alan continued: “I’ll take it from here” but Biggy came in again and said: “hello, I’m the dummy here?”

Alan replied: “That’s pretty obvious![‘Dummy’, get it?]

The crowd laughed, so did Zoner. This is great, Alan thought, and continued the act.

It was time for the verdict. Everyone was worried. Zoner was going through the cards and then said: “The winner and, believe me, I didn’t even think we would have one, is [drum roll] … Alan!”

The crowd cheered. Alan took the trophy in his hand. Right then he saw his grandpa. He rushed out and gave him a hug: “ Thanks for the dummy.”

His grandpa replied: “I knew you’d like it.”

Alan looked at his dummy. It grinned widely at him. Alan gave him a hug too.