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The Snowman
Starring: Michael Fassbender, Rebecca Ferguson, Val Kilmer
Director: Tomas Alfredson
Genre: Crime thriller
Rating: 18+
RUNTIME: 125 Mins
When I looked at the upcoming cinema release schedule and saw The Snowman on the list, I was hit by a sudden jolt of nostalgia. Was the 1982 Christmas classic, although far too early, getting a brief re-release for Bahrain audiences?
Was I about to be transported back to those festive evenings spent by the fire watching a little ginger boy being flown around the world by a reanimated snowman?
Sadly, it was all a lie, and 2017’s The Snowman is actually a rather brutal and bloody crime drama. I hope parents don’t make the same assumption I did and take their youngest along, as they’d be dealing with nightmares and blood-curdling screams until Christmas!
In fact, I’d suggest the adults stay at home too because this is murder mystery fare at its most average. It’s a shame, too, considering the star-studded cast. Michael Fassbender is one of the most sought-after actors in the business, and Rebecca Ferguson is a talented newcomer. However, they have to deal with plodding dialogue and a script that seems to have been written on the fly.
The film is an adaption of Norwegian author Jo Nesbø’s 2007 novel, and sees a killer targeting the young mothers of Oslo, building a sinister snowman as a calling card before striking.
Maverick detective Harry Hole (Fassbender) is officially between cases, but he charms his way onto this one by shadowing a new arrival at the city’s police department, Katrine Bratt (Ferguson). Following a long trail of clues, the pair expands the investigation to include different cities and unsolved murders stretching back decades, soon realising they have a serial killer on their hands.
Their inquiries turn up murky connections between wealthy industrialist Arve Stop (JK Simmons), creepy doctor Idar Vetleson (David Dencik) and boozy detective Gert Rafto (Val Kilmer), who died years before in an apparent shotgun suicide.
In parallel with his police duties, Harry is also struggling to stay on good terms with his estranged ex-wife, her new partner, and his sulky teenage stepson. But as the murder investigation deepens, the killer gets Harry’s family in his sights, and their deadly cat-and-mouse game turns personal.
Fassbender plays the kind of rule-breaking antihero who ticks every cliché on the flawed-genius screen detective checklist. Harry’s crime-fighting instincts are brilliant but unorthodox, which means his stuffy bosses indulge him while female co-workers find him dangerously irresistible.
He is a chain-smoking drunkard who routinely passes out on park benches, yet strangely still possesses the athletic stamina to chase villains across vast frozen landscapes wearing nothing but tastefully understated Nordic knitwear.
In its favour, The Snowman looks magnificent. Norway is a gift to director Tomas Alfredson, with his strong eye for snow-covered landscapes and stylishly bare modernist interiors. Furthermore, Nordic architecture allows plenty of deep shadows, towering churches and cavernous municipal halls, while the vast hinterland beyond the city becomes a majestic winter wonderland of frozen lakes and snowy peaks.
As mentioned, The Snowman also boasts a fine cast, though its leaden script and perfunctory characterisation leave scant room for subtle performances. Fassbender coasts through the movie with his roguish charm on autopilot.
Ferguson struggles to wring any emotion out of terrible writing, while most of the other cast are reduced to smiling or snarling cameos.
Kilmer’s the most bizarre of all, with his haggard appearance and mannered dialogue that seems to be overdubbed in places.
The Snowman only has one major secret to keep us in suspense: the identity of the killer. Even for viewers unfamiliar with the book, this not-so-shocking surprise becomes pretty easy to call about midway through the story, leaving Alfredson to fill another hour with increasingly silly red herrings and pointless blind alleys.
In a movie that had more layers, deeper questions and more fully evolved characters, such predictable touches would not necessarily be fatal lapses. But The Snowman does not do subtext. Indeed, it’s by-the-numbers script barely qualifies as text.
When the killer’s risible psychological motivation is finally revealed, it feels as if the screenwriters began reading Freud for Dummies, but did not even get to the end. While not blatantly terrible, the film ultimately falls way short of what a superior big-budget thriller should deliver.
Now showing in: Cineco, Saar, Seef II, Wad Al Sail
Kristian’s Verdict: 2/5
