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Waiting for Adam

November 25 - December 1, 2009
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FOUR-YEAR-OLD Alex Jones sits alone staring out of her bedroom window wondering why her beloved brother, Adam, is missing from her side, why mummy has had to stay away and why daddy is racked with worry.

Alex, left, is not the only one in the expat community of Bahrain that is in shock and cannot fully comprehend what has happened.

In a traumatic seven-and-a-half weeks, a normal happy family has been torn apart in a disturbing battle over custody of a 10-year-old boy.

A home that was always filled with the voices of neighbours' children popping in to play with the popular brother and sister is now quiet as the Jones family concentrates its energy into bringing Adam back home to Bahrain.

The world's press has been focussing on the dilemma facing Rebecca Jones who was tricked into signing Arabic legal documents and found her son snatched away during a visit to her late husband's family in Qatar.

Support for the Jones family is pouring in and friends and well-wishers in Bahrain have now started support groups and hope to get relevant governmental approval to start raising funds to help the family pull through the crisis.

Sales of home-made cakes, T-shirts emblazoned with 'Bring Adam Back Home' and other means of raising money and awareness are being discussed.

Many of the supporters are also parents of children at St Christopher's School in Bahrain - the same school Adam should be attending.

Barrie Jones, Rebecca's second husband, is also trying to set up a fundraising and awareness appeal in the UK to help provide the funds necessary to take their legal battle to the next step.

Rebecca this week enjoyed a two-day visit from her daughter as they have both been missing each other terribly. Alex returned to Bahrain yesterday.

On Monday, the first glimmer of hope came when a Qatari court ruled in Rebecca's favour over visitation rights which had earlier been denied.

This afternoon she will be allowed to meet Adam for three hours at his grandmother's house. It is understood that it will under the supervision of a court official and in front of members of the family who have taken him.

Rebecca told GulfWeekly shortly after the verdict: "I want to hold Adam, hug him and take any doubt out of his mind that I have left him.

"It is going to be traumatic for both of us. I am so happy that I will finally be able to see him again but I am also dreading that I will have to walk away at the end it without Adam by my side.

"It will not be an easy meeting as I am sure he will get upset and scared but the most important thing for us is to let him know that I am here in Qatar and we will be together soon.

"I have missed him so much and I am more determined than ever to get him back."

A new legal appeal over Adam's custody will be made in the Qatari courts this week following the visit.

Karina Kaleem, a St Christopher's parent who is part of the support group, said: "We are a group of mothers who are standing by Rebecca to say it is totally unfair to remove a child from his sole surviving parent's care in such a manner. Adam is a minor and it is imperative for his well being that he should be returned to his mother."

There is an empty chair in Adam's classroom at St Christopher's Junior School in Saar and his cubby is lying vacant too. Adam's classmates frequently ask parents and members of staff when he will be returning to school.

They have produced 'Miss You' cards and launched hundreds of yellow balloons in protest and have obviously been deeply affected by his absence.

Another parent, Tanya Lunn, has never met Rebecca but is vocal in her support for the family. "My daughter Imogen is in Adam's class and asks me; 'mummy, what can we do to get him back?' which is why I think it is important for me to help in whatever way I can."

Meanwhile, an online petition with more than 2,000 signatures will be sent to the wife of Qatari Amir Shaikh Hamad bin Khalifa Al Thani, Shaikha Moza's office today by supporter Sharon Haji.

Sharon, a British expat, and her Bahraini husband, Ali Haji, set up the Facebook group calling for Adam's return.

The social networking site is growing daily and now boasts more than 6,000 members. Although Mrs Haji has never met Rebecca and Adam she is passionate about helping the family secure Adam's return. She said: "This is an issue that concerns all expatriate women who are married to Arabs.

"I am planning to leave the petition open so we can resend it when more people sign in. The pressure will not cease until Adam is safely returned to his family in Bahrain.

"I'm a school teacher and I see a child's need for his or her parents, especially the mother."

According to the latest communication with Shaikha Moza's office it is understood that the Amir's wife is aware of the case and is sympathetic with Rebecca's plight.

The situation is also receiving the attention of Bahraini Foreign Minister Shaikh Khalid bin Ahmed Al Khalifa.

Rebecca's mother, Joanne Chapman, 69, has travelled from her home in Australia to be by her daughter's side in Qatar, and said: "I'm staying here until the end and will not leave without Adam. No one has the right to steal a woman's child.

"I was at Rebecca's side when Adam was born and have travelled twice a year from Australia ever since his birth to visit him in Bahrain."

Adam was born at Awali Hospital on May 31, 1999. "Jamal - Adam's Qatari father - and I were already separated at the time of Adam's birth," explained Rebecca, 43.

Jamal Al Madhaiki met Sheffield-born Rebecca Chapman in 1995 when she was working at ABN Amro Bank in Bahrain as a human resource co-ordinator. They married in 1998 and while Rebecca stayed in Bahrain, Jamal commuted back and forth from Qatar to be with his new wife.

Jamal and Rebecca separated when Rebecca became pregnant and in accordance to Islamic Sharia Law did not divorce until three months after Adam's birth.

"It was my choice to become a Muslim - Noor is Rebecca's Muslim name - at the time of my marriage because I felt that if I had children then it would be difficult to raise a child in a mixed religious family.

"I studied Islam and felt that it was a religion with good family principles. It is a guide to a good clean life. I never drank or smoke and although I cannot say my prayers in Arabic I have declared my faith to God. I do my best to follow the right path and have always tried to teach the same to Adam.

"Jamal was not a strict Muslim and was more of a liberal-minded individual than many members of his family. Jamal was not in Qatar at the time of Adam's birth and visited me a couple of days later to see his son."

At the time of their divorce in 1999, Rebecca says Jamal neither raised the question of Adam's custody nor was there any understanding that Adam - Fawaz Jamal Juma Abdullah Al Madhaiki on his Qatari passport - would, after a certain age, go and live with his father.

"There was absolutely no question of custody as Jamal saw and knew how loved and cherished Adam was in my care. He visited Adam several times in Bahrain till his death in 2005. Although he was not involved with Adam's day-to-day upbringing he was very fond of his son and there was a special bond between them."

Adam's dad was also happy with him attending St Christopher's School which offers a British curriculum and is popular with many Muslim families on the island.

It has been reported that the Qatari authorities, however, have heard it described as a 'missionary school'.

No legal papers were signed and a relationship based on trust fostered between Rebecca, Jamal and his family.

Adam, at the age of three, travelled alone with his father to spend time in Qatar at the family home. Later in 2003, Jamal remarried Hanata, a Brazilian, and Rebecca married Welsh-born Barrie - named Fawaz Mohammad when he converted to Islam.

"When I met Rebecca I was impressed how she as a single mother was raising Adam. I was also divorced at the time with two boys and we both were going through similar issues which brought us together," said Barrie, 43, a sales executive at technology company Symantec, based in Saudi Arabia.

Rebecca's critics say that being a Muslim woman she should have known Sharia law pertaining to custody of children from first marriages and that Adam's upbringing should have been more 'traditional'.

Rebecca insists that throughout the years she has ensured that Adam remains closely connected to his Qatari roots. "Adam is enrolled in a two-hour weekly Arabic programme at school that is only offered to native Arabs. He also does one hour of Islam in school. We have an Arabic tutor coming home twice a week to help Adam read and write. Adam is an Arab and a Muslim and we never took that away from him.

"Jamal and I enjoyed an amicable relationship and there were absolutely no issues with visits to our home to meet Adam. In fact, I went to pay my respects and spent three days at the family home when Jamal died in a motorcycle accident. If Jamal were alive he would never have let this happen. He was a good person."

According to both Rebecca and Barrie, Jamal's mother, brothers and sisters occasionally visited the Jones' family home in Budaiya to meet Adam.

Earlier this year Ali Al Madhaiki, Jamal's youngest brother, on one of his visits to Bahrain, took Adam out alone on an outing. Based on this trust, Rebecca never questioned when Jamal's older brother, Fahad Al Madhaiki, asked to pick up Adam from his hotel room in Qatar so he could meet his ailing 77-year-old grandmother, Mariam Al Madhaiki, before they returned to Bahrain.

"I trusted Ali when he asked for Adam's Qatari passport a day before our departure saying that he needed to make minor changes in it. I trusted Fahad when he asked me to sign an Arabic document saying that it was a document simplifying legal matters related to their family home in the event of Jamal's mother's demise, as Adam would also be one of the beneficiaries. But I was hysterical when I later discovered that I had actually signed a court notification paper stating that my late husband's mother was filing a custody case for Adam."

Rebecca claims that the chain of events leading to Adam being taken away had been pre-planned meticulously.

"I have just discovered Jamal's family had filed for Adam's custody in 2008 but the court threw the case out as he was not a resident of Qatar. They had to bring us here to do the court proceedings and we were unaware of this fact.

"I tried to file a kidnapping case against Fahad as my child is in my opinion illegally held in their care but the court is treating it as a custody case because I unknowingly signed the court notification."

Earlier this year, officials from the Minor's Affairs Authority of Qatar visited Bahrain to check on Adam, his schooling, upbringing as an Arab and wrote a favourable report which Rebecca fears her late husband's family is trying to suppress.

Adam has inheritance in the form of land and money as Jamal's sole surviving heir that is being monitored and controlled by the Minor's Affairs Authority in Qatar.

Until this afternoon's planned meeting Rebecca had not been allowed to see or speak to Adam since he was taken away on October 5.

A Qatari court has awarded Adam's custody to his grandmother who was not even present in the courtroom at the time of the hearing.

Mariam Al Madhaiki, who is diabetic and knows little English, allegedly told a Bahraini friend of Rebecca's in a telephone conversation in Arabic: "Rebecca does not have a son anymore. Adam is a replacement for my dead son. We are keeping him."

GulfWeekly has made several attempts to contact the Al Madhaiki family and our calls have not been returned.

Adam bears close resemblance to his late father in both looks and mannerism. He is a sensitive and caring child who suffers from mild dyspraxia - a condition that affects his motor skills. "Adam has difficulty with reading and writing and has learning support at school. I work very hard with Adam at home and monitor his progress closely at school," said Rebecca who is a stay-at-home mum.

"He is immature for his age and has frequent nightmares. If Adam is put in a new situation he often becomes nervous and scared and a day-to-day routine helps in his well being."

Adam has been told by the Al Madhaiki family that he has been moved to Qatar because of a swine flu scare in Bahrain.

The British Embassy in Qatar has been denied consular access to Adam three times. Social Workers from the Minor's Affairs Authority were allowed to briefly meet Adam once and they reported that Adam was being kept busy with other children in the extended family and appeared to be in a good condition.

The Minor's Affairs Authority has been trying to pave the way for an out-of-court agreement. Earlier, Fahad Al Madhaiki denied access to Rebecca that he had agreed to in a meeting at the Minor's Affairs Authority office.

Despite the roller-coaster of emotions surrounding their situation, Barrie and Rebecca are keeping faith with the legal system and are determined to fight until they get their beloved Adam back with them.

"Our lives have changed and our family unit has been destroyed. All our focus at the moment is on getting Adam back and I believe that he will be returned to us. I have been living in the Middle East for more than 10 years and I know with experience that things do get sorted out in time," said Barrie.

Rebecca has lived in the Middle East for 25 years and says that this is not a battle against Qatar. "This is one Arab family that has done this and everyone is not the same. I cannot imagine my life without Adam. There is a God and he knows what they have done. I respected them as a family but I am devastated by this."

Sign the petition on the front page, visit www.gulfweekly.com - www.bringadamhome.com - www.petitiononline.com/zoomoo99/ petition.html







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